March 15, 2022

Life : It Happens in The Middle

"I think everything in life is art. What you do. How you dress. The way you love someone and how you talk. Your smile and your personality. What you believe in and all your dreams. Life is art." So says actress Helena Bonham Carter, known for her roles in Harry Potter and The Crown, among others.

Contrast that quote with a dictionary definition:" Art is the expression or application of human creative skill and imagination, typically in a form like such as painting, music, literature, and dance."

I vote for Ms. Carter's depiction. For too many, art is what other people do, the creative ones, with a paint-smeared smock or pottery clay on the floor. It is the stack of papers that represent an 85,000-word novel. Art is a photograph of a sunset behind the mountains that takes your breath away or a ballerina able to spin on her toes flawlessly during Swan Lake.

True, all those examples represent art. Each shows a particular talent or skill that results in a physical or visual outcome. Our world is better for every one of those examples. Yet, they are such a small segment of what makes art in our world, so limiting in how we tend to see our lives.

Let me take a detour for a moment and see if this new thought connects with what I have just said. If you read a book, watch a movie, even read a magazine article, it will have a beginning, a middle, and an ending. This was a lesson you likely learned in English class while writing an essay or book report. 

Something must set the scene to grab your attention, to pull you into whatever you are reading or watching. Then, a story unfolds that motivates you to stay with it. Finally, a conclusion brings all the loose ends to a satisfying conclusion.

Again, not a lightning bolt of awareness. The parallel between this basic concept and living is evident, too. We are born, we fill the years with everything that makes up our life on earth, and then all of it ends. We hope that the memories that linger bring smiles to the faces of those still here. We hope that we left something behind that made another human life better.

A morning meditation not long ago brought all this to mind; the subject was impermanence. Our thoughts come and go, relationships, too. A loved dog or cat is part of our life for maybe a dozen years and then lives in our memories. Nothing we touch, experience, create, hold, build, paint, or love is permanent. All are fleeting in the grand scheme of things.

Just like the last amazing book you read or movie that melted your heart,  our life is built around the same model: we had a beginning, we are living in the middle, and at some time, we end. We don't control the beginning; we usually have little control over how our story ends. 

Sure, circumstances of where and how our story begins do matter, but we can't affect that. The mortality of all living things means we can't just decide to live another 10 or 20 years if that isn't in our genetic makeup. It is the middle that is really up to us.

So, to loop back to the opening quote, the creative part of life that Ms. Carter is talking about is the middle. This is where the uniqueness of you happens. Whether that middle is meaningful, is satisfying, leaves a positive mark, and is more than just bridging the gap from the beginning to the endpoint is, to a degree, our story to write. Even if the circumstances of someone's life have been difficult, filled with struggle and loss, the way that person reacts to the hand dealt them makes all the difference. 

And, I contend that how you fill your middle is what makes you both creative and artistic, it is what makes you fully human and irreplaceable. Not permanent, very much impermanent, but with an ability unique among living creatures to express yourself in ways that no other human ever created can replicate.

Life is a beginning, a middle, and an end. It is what we do in the middle that makes it distinctive.


16 comments:

  1. I completely agree that life's middle creates who we are. The beginning is education, establishing work and lifestyle. Maturity takes a long time IMO. I think we arrived at the middle around age 40 and now at 60, I still think of us in the middle even though I retired at 58 :-)

    I can't wait to read other's perspectives and comments!

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    1. I will be 73 in May. In my worldview I am still in the middle because I am healthy and active. So, you have many "middle" years ahead of you, Elle!

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  2. That was my first thought too, Bob, that despite already hitting 70 I hope I'm still in the middle. Btw, I agree, certainly Helena Bonham Carter's definition is more "artful" than the one in the dictionary.

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    1. I was grabbed by Ms Carter's definition also. "Life is art" covers anything than any of us choose to do with our "middle."

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  3. Hi Bob! I completely agree with the Bonham Carter quote about creativity. Everything is creative. But your statement about the flow of life, beginning, middle, end has me thinking. I tend to think that the "uniqueness" that we are is all of it. Beginning, middle and conclusion...and I hesitate calling it ending because I don't think it ends, just reorganizes itself. Even art never really "ends." I read somewhere that a painting is never done...the artist just decides when to stop. Even in a story. True characters (hopefully) live on even when the author comes to a conclusion and wraps things up. Spring turns into summer into fall into winter and then spring comes again. Of course as you say, what we do with that portion we've been given is our "art" for sure. Just my thoughts of course. ~Kathy

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    1. No disagreement here. In fact, watching a 4 year old solve a problem is usually fascinating. They approach the dilemma without rules or barriers.

      The Middle is a term that I think of as being from say, 8 to 10 and then to 80ish, not just middle age. It is when we know enough to think independently and make some important decisions. It is when we should allow our creativity and "art" to blossom.

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  4. I find the middle keeps changing. I remember when "On Golden Pond" a 1981 film about an aging couple was out in the theatres. Henry Fonda was the male lead and saying how he was feeling old and Katharine Hepburn playing his wife says "You're not old, you're still middle aged." To which Henry Fonda's character responds "I'm not middle aged. Nobody lives to 140!"

    I recall how old he seemed at the time (I was still in my 20s then). I looked at that film recently and he doesn't seem so old now. Henry Fonda was 76 in 1981 and Katharine Hepburn 2 years younger. Time flies.

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    1. One of my favorites...remember the line about "suck face"?

      You are right. I remember thinking he was rather feeble. If I rewatched it now, his character might feel more like a peer.

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  5. I’ve had a full life and have enjoyed a lot of things..big and little. Had some down ones as well. Now 75, I still feel in the middle, but later middle. It’s like being on a train..many trains throughout one's life, but now I’m probably on the next to the last train. One more off and on to the final one that literally comes to a dead end.

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    1. 75 and in late middle life...my attitude exactly. Any age between birth and death where we are free to express ourselves and live in a way that pleases us is the middle I am writing about.

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    2. I like your anology of the trains. At this time in my life I think I'd like to hop off that train and walk for a bit and meander. I'm in no rush to board that final train! LOL!

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  6. I am working to make "the middle" as long as possible. Evidence shows that exercising creative interests and remaining a student for life makes the middle years rewarding... and also seems to contribute to maintaining our cognitive function into our "concluding years."

    https://www.insidehook.com/article/health-and-fitness/cognitive-fitness-reduce-risk-dementia

    I love to learn and experience the world and work to help my friends and family do the same. And I hope that remains true until the end.

    Rick in Oregon

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    1. I have read enough studies about maintaining strong brain functions for an extended period to believe in the absolute importance of exercise, both physical and mental to keep our "middle" as productive as possible.

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  7. A lot of creative thinking on these comments 🥴 I approach it from a different direction (of course I do). To me, the middle means that I can take my time and do it whenever I get around to it. By looking at my life as near the end has an immediacy that prevent procrastinating. "If not now, then when?" I love that quote.

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    1. That is part of the reason for your "Travels with Charlie" plan...if not now, when?

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