December 27, 2016

End of Year Break

Bob, Betty, and Bailey

Ready or not, the new year is coming. To give myself time to recharge, I will be taking the week off between Christmas and Near Year's. Look for a fresh post on January 2nd.

December 20, 2016

Post-Truth - I Feel Like Alice in Wonderland

Nothing is as it seems. What I know to be real, believe to be true built on my reliance on facts is apparently passe. It's official: Truth is dead. 

The latest edition of the Oxford Dictionary has made it official. Post-truth now has an explanation: "objective facts are less influential in shaping public opinion than appeals to emotion and personal belief." 

Of course, that definition is post-truth, so it may or may not be true. The Oxford Dictionary may be a propaganda tool written by the liberal media, the alt-right, conservative pundits, or some unknown Russian hacker. 

And, therein lies the problem that has me scratching my head. If "truth" or "reality" are no longer what they have always been, how does one separate the wheat from the chaff? How does one construct a rational response to events when rationality is under attack?

Is Mars really populated by little green men (and women)? If enough people on the Internet claim it to be so, then does that makes it so? Did we go to the moon, or just stage a launch in a studio? Is there a child sex ring being run from the basement of a pizza restaurant by a former presidential candidate? Is the government planning on installing microchips in our arm the next time we get a flu shot? 

These examples are absurd, at least to me, but believed at some point in our history. They gained traction with our fellow citizens. No matter how bizarre or disconnected from how we think the world and its citizens operate, any statement has the potential to be accepted in a post-truth world.

So, how do you determine the difference between what is downright silly or ludicrous, and that what is true, meaning facts and reality support the premise? At the risk of being seen as part of a plot to deceive, I offer the following suggestions:

1). If something seems too far-fetched to be true, then do your research rather than accept it as presented. Most of us agree that if something is too good to be true, like an Hawaiian vacation for $99, then it probably is a scam. Use that same discernment with news or "facts" that raise questions. Something important can be found in multiple sources, not just one that is re-tweeted or shared over and over.

2) Realize that truth or facts are not dependent on what you believe. They are independent of emotions and beliefs. An inconvenient truth is still true. 

3) If someone claims to have the answer to a complex or difficult question that has bedeviled humans for a long time, question that solution. Complex problems do not have simple answers, especially those that can be summed up in a 140 character tweet.

4) Does the story attack a large non-specific foe, like Big Government, or Republicans, or The Media? Such broad-brush revelations are very rarely based on fact, but much more likely emotion or a particular agenda.

5) Accept that uncomfortable "truths" may require you to change your world view or opinions about something. To ignore or deny simply because you may have to change is done at your own peril.

6) "Truth" does not change over time: the world was flat for thousands of years until the truth of its roundness became obvious. The world was always round; people just didn't have the tools or mindset to accept it. What changes is our awareness and understanding of what is true, not the truths behind it.

With all that being said, I would add a suggestion: question everything. Just like the round world example, question what you believe at every turn. The "truth" as you know it may be wrong, or not fully understood. Be ready to adjust to new, credible, information. It is not easy, it goes against human nature. But that is the only way we evolve as a species: to separate fiction from truth, rejecting the former while embracing the latter.

If you'd like to read an interesting article, check out this link from NPR:

December 16, 2016

To Everything There Is a Season

2016 has been a year when we decimated parts of our budget. As someone who has lived with a strict budget since my first years in college (was that really 49 years ago?), I am a firm believer in knowing what I spend and staying within the lines. 

Last year was when my share of my parents' estate started to find its way to into my accounts. By early this year I was feeling quite flush. With even more money to come over the next 4 years before the estate is closed down for good, additional cash flow was on the horizon.

Betty and I have always lived well beneath our means. One of the reasons we were able to retire 15 years ago was the habit of carrying no debt beyond a mortgage, and saving 20-25% of our income each year. We have played it close to the vest; there have been plenty of splurges for vacations with the kids, but we never ignored the income/outgo realities. Well, this year not so much.

Call it pent up demand, a realization that if not now, then when, or just never having the resources so readily available, but our budget for vacations and trips went out the window...way out the window.

Let's review: renting a house for the whole family 3 blocks from the beach in San Diego for a week around the 4th of July, taking a 7 day Alaskan Cruise, putting 5,000 miles on the RV during a 7 week long trip as far east as North Carolina, RVing in Show Low, spending a few nights in a hotel in Flagstaff and flying to Disneyland for a weekend at The Magic Kingdom with the family.  As you might guess, the financial cost was high, about 300% of what had been set aside on January 1st, not including repairs to the RV.

After the big party come the consequences. The spilled drinks must be cleaned up, the trash disposed of, the scratched furniture fixed, and that hole in the entry hall repaired. If the big party involves expensive travel and experience-gathering, the consequences are every bit as real.

For the last two weeks I have been pouring over the 2017 budget. Betty and I agree that during the coming year we will be much more restrained. We are cutting back on categories as diverse as furnishings and backyard improvements, kitchen cabinet refinishing, our clothing expenditures, and an office redesign for me. The 13 year old second car will continue to occupy one side of the garage rather than being replaced.

Direct TV may go away, especially if they raise the rates again. Much like cable, we watch 10-20 of the 200+ channels available, making the cost per choice rather pricey. Our telephone bill has surpassed our water bill each month. It may be time to find another carrier.

Vacations are still part of the budget, but as a much smaller line item. Long weekend RV trips within 6 hours of our home are in our future for the new year. Two month-long jaunts, cruises, or beach house rentals are right out. 

Looking ahead, 2018 may be a year when we add back some more elaborate adventures. Betty would like to go back to Europe. I would love a cruise around the South Pacific. We may have one more long RV trip in us (and the RV). By showing serious restraint in the new year, our investments will have had time to grow and support a more expansive 2018. 

I am reminded of the verses in the Bible and the song by the Byrds: To everything there is a season, Turn, Turn, Turn. 2016 has been a season of big memories and big dreams. 2017 will turn smaller and closer to home. It will be a season of regrouping, but still a season of our life that is satisfying and fulfilling.

December 13, 2016

5 Reasons a Vacation Can Disappoint

All of us have probably experienced at least one vacation that didn't live up to expectations. The planning, the anticipation, along with the money and time invested produced a flop. No matter how we sugar-coated the experience, that vacation was disappointing.

Of course, some of the reasons can be purely bad luck: getting sick or being injured can happen. Something goes wrong at home or with family and the vacation must be ended quickly. But, in thinking about vacations my family and I have taken over the years, there are five factors that seem to conspire to lay waste to the best-laid plans. Being reminded of their potential to mess things up may help you avoid a vacation washout. 

Over or Under Scheduled

I am a planner. When my family and I take a vacation, the days are often plotted as carefully as a military campaign. If we are going to spend the money and take the time, by golly, we will not waste a minute, we will enjoy everything and at double speed. Luckily, my wife and one of my daughters are fine with this. Our youngest, though, does her best to suggest we take time off to smell those darn roses, sleep in, and leave time for simple pleasures. I will be the first to admit, her approach is gaining appeal as I get older. Why should a vacation be a forced march?

When Betty and I took our first Alaskan cruise this year, I became aware of the joys of under scheduling. Yes, a cruise ship offers all sorts of ways to separate you from your time and money. But, you can choose to skip most of it and simple enjoy the scenery passing by the windows, eat when you are hungry, and watch others rush from seminar to casino to sales pitch. 

Each of us feels most comfortable with one of these two models. Adopting the wrong approach can leave you frustrated.  

Unrealistic Expectations

You walk to the corner mailbox and back once a day. You stroll with the dog to the neighborhood park first thing every morning. Neither of these activities means you are ready to hike across England, or tackle part of the Application Trail. Swimming a few laps in your pool doesn't prepare you for an ocean dive to earn your scuba certificate.

A vacation with an ambitious goal can be tremendously satisfying, or quite a letdown. Trying different foods, avoiding the top tourist destinations while seeking out where the locals go are laudable targets. Trying something physically beyond your capabilities, or forcing yourself to only eat local cuisine for a two week stay in Sweden will probably lead to disappointment, if not injury or illness.

Knowing your limits and knowing what crosses the line from interesting to excessive are important.

Wrong place or wrong time

You don't like cold weather yet you decide to go to Iceland in January because the airfares are cheap. Bugs and humidity drive you batty. Even so, you decide Miami in August would be a fun experience because the hotels are less expensive. 

Your oldest child just landed the lead in the school play, but you think it best to take the whole family on a camping trip to Yosemite. Your wife opened a new business that needs her full time attention for several months. You are surprised when she balks at a week in New York City.

A vacation is a balancing act between time, needs, and location. While not everyone may be jumping with joy, everyone should be engaged enough to agree that the potential for fun exists.

Expecting it to be the same as home

I shudder when I hear a tourist complain about something by saying, "We do that differently at home." My immediate thought is, well, stay home! What would be the point of going somewhere and having everything just like where you live? Isn't the point of travel to see and experience differences? 

During our trips to Europe, I can't count the number of times I heard travelers react poorly to everything, from the time restaurants open, to the type of toilets that are available. A foreign country isn't home. Even parts of this country have different customs and norms, even names. Don't ask for a milk shake in Boston or a grinder in Amarillo. Different can be good.

Bad weather (really bad!)

We have spent 3 days stuck in a motel in Key West during a hurricane. We have been almost blown off the road during an RV trip through West Texas. Betty and I experienced six straight days of rain in Bermuda. We were caught in a blizzard near Yellowstone in late May.

Bad weather happens. It happens when you are spending time and money on a special trip. Mother Nature always wins. You can only change plans on the fly, make the most of a bad situation, but realize you will have a great story to tell when you do get home (our daughters still remember the Key West "adventure" almost 25 years later). 

Bad weather also teaches us that no matter how much we like to be in control, that is usually just an illusion.

December 9, 2016

The Achievements You Are Most Proud Of

We have all experienced disappointments, loss, and troubles both big and small. If you live long enough there will be things you have done you'd probably like to undo. Life is a never-ending challenge that requires us to have hope in ourselves and the future.

All too often, though, we can forget our achievements, those things we have done over our lifetime that make us happy, maybe even a little proud. As we enter the last few weeks of 2016 (Yea!) I thought it might be encouraging to focus on some of the achievements that we are most proud of. I will list a few of mine to get you started. Notice that some of the things on my list seem rather small. But, that is the important thing about achievements: size doesn't matter.

1. I quit smoking (That was a tough one)

2. Raised two well-adjusted, happy daughters who want me in their lives

3. Have been happily married to the same woman for over 40 years 

4. Am loved by my grand kids

5. Rebounded from being fired to forming a successful business

6. Retired early and have made it work

7. My parents were proud of me and loved being part of my family's life

8. Learning to scuba dive

9. Haven't become a grumpy old man (yet!)

OK, what is on your list? Take a little time to think about all you have accomplished in your life. What are some things that make you smile, make you feel good, make you proud? 

December 8, 2016

Comments and Restrictions

Over the past several weeks the number of comments left on the blog have dropped. I have been notified by one reader that she has encountered problems adding a comment, usually in the form of a a multi-step captcha process.

I have made no change to the comment verification requirement to the blog. For older posts I do review the comment before it is added. But, for newer posts, I find it easier to simply delete the occasional ones that don't fit. Also, Google seems to do a decent job of detecting obviously inappropriate attempts.

So, I have a two part question to my regular readers:

1) Have you had problems adding comments over the last few weeks? If so, please email me at to let me know.

2) If you have been commenting less, is it because the posts aren't the type that prompt you to leave your thoughts, or is your schedule just too busy at this time of year to be quite as active?

Your feedback will help me alert Google if there is a problem on their end. If the recent posts aren't as stimulating as they have been in the past, that is helpful to know, too.

Thanks for your feedback.


December 5, 2016

An Outsider Looks At Social Media

Well, not a true outsider. I do have a Satisfying Retirement and personal Facebook page and a Twitter account. Primarily, I use them to promote this blog. I will comment on someone else's postings if I feel particularly engaged by something, but not very often. I don't use LinkedIn or Pinterest. I have heard of Snapchat but know nothing about it. Instagram is not part of my life. Even Google Plus isn't on my radar. So, compared to a lot of folks I am a low level social media participant. 

Interestingly, the demographic with the largest growth in Internet use over the past half dozen years are those in the 65+ age group. Daily Internet use jumped 71%, with an accompanying 34% increase in the use of social media. 

Staying in touch with family, relatives, or reconnecting with friends are key motivators. Social media can help reduce feelings of isolation or being out of step in a world that is increasingly technological in orientation. Recently, I was contacted about my 50th High School Reunion by someone who tracked me down on Facebook. Twitter is being used to keep up with the topics folks are talking about. Discussion groups and finding others who share opinions and struggles can be empowering. 

I fully support that type of involvement. When its use helps lessen feelings of loneliness or allows someone to connect with others who share concerns and beliefs, social media can be a powerful tool for good. Learning to use a computer and navigate the Internet helps keep an aging mind active and open.

But, with that new world come risks and dangers. A week or so ago I wrote about the malware epidemic. One of the targets that hackers love is social media.  Clicking on a link that seems interesting or going to another site to look at a fascinating video can lead to computer infection. Stealing someone's identity or taking over another's Twitter or Facebook account is a rather common occurrence.

Actually, I have had both my Twitter and Facebook accounts hacked. In each instance someone started sending out spam and dangerous links to those in my on-line "friends.". Luckily, I was notified quickly that I appeared to be sending out odd information. 

Another recent development is the problem of fake news on Facebook and other sites. These legitimate-looking articles contain "news" stories that have little or no truth in them. They are designed to promote a particular point of view, to deceive readers, or to prompt action based on fabrications. I must admit I have clicked on several stories that seemed to be legitimate, but on closer examination, were not.

Social Media can be anonymous. The name chosen to represent someone is usually not the person's real name. Even a picture may be of someone else. With that comes a problem. It is too easy to hide behind a made-up name and spew hate or slurs with impunity.

Though we tend to think of younger folks as the ones using social media to settle scores or degrade someone, I doubt if age is a reliable test. During the last election season, Twitter, Facebook, and I assume other sites, were positively toxic at times and it seemed clear that many of the participants were from our age group.

Even if you'd never consider sending messages like that, just reading them can be upsetting and depressing. It is vital that we steer clear of reading things that are designed to add stress to our lives or cause us to react in a negative way.

Social Media has been a tremendous tool for good. If used responsibly these outlets keep us connected, informed, and entertained. Like almost anything else, if used recklessly or without common sense, there can be serious problems. 

User beware.

December 1, 2016

A Letter To My 40 Year Old Self

If given the chance I am not sure I would want to go back almost 30 years to give pointers to my 40 year old self. The rule of unintended consequences would might make such time travel a disaster. But, for purposes of this post, let's pretend it would be a good thing.

Dear Bob,
Experience is unteachable. It can only be gained by living and learning. If you will allow me to tell you what is to come in the next few decades of your life, I may be able to spare you a lot of wasted time, effort, and heartache. 
I am not going to detail what happens with your career. If I do you might be tempted to change something and therefore miss both the highs and lows you will experience. So, just trust me, you do well and you will overcome some sizable bumps in the road. And, since you are reading this letter you know you won't die young.
I won't tell you what is ahead in America or the world. Nor, will I make you a rich man by alerting you to inventions before they are reality, or tell you if the Cubs ever win the World Series. Those are mysteries that will unfold, in their proper time and sequence.
But, I will tell you four things now, that if you pay attention, will make your life fuller and more satisfying than you might imagine. They are in order or importance, so don't skip to #2 before you deal with the first one.
#1) Nothing is more important than relationships & friends.
There is nothing in life that can make you happier and more joyous, or more depressed and sad than neglecting important relationships. No amount of money, no second home, no possessions, no fame, no power, nothing can fill the void in your life if you allow meaningful relationships to die. 
We are not designed to be alone. We need others to care for, and care for us, to allow us to feel alive. A strong and fulfilling marriage is not required for a satisfying life, but it can make things so much sweeter. Don't put off fixing problems or assume that things will work themselves out. Your marriage will endure (spoiler alert), but you will lose a few decades of true partnership and joy if you place your career and self above your wife's needs.
You need friends, true, deep, share-everything-type friends. Take whatever steps are necessary to keep renewing your roster of friends. It becomes much harder to develop deep relationships the longer you wait.

#2) Trust your common sense and yourself.
Experts are highly overrated in too many areas of life. A doctor, a good lawyer, a caring spiritual these areas pick the best people you can find. But, for many of the decisions you will have to make for the rest of your life, depend on what mom and dad taught you, what you have learned so far, what trusted loved ones tell you, and your moral code. 
Believe in the gifts the Creator gave you to pick the right path, or get back on track if your steps falter. Now and then, self doubt is normal. But, don't let it paralyze you. Any action is better than inaction. Doing nothing is actually a choice. Decide to take a step and see what happens. 

#3) Good comes from every experience, even the ones that seem bad.
You have been raised to believe their is a superior being who has a plan for everything and everyone. Every bad experience you have has an eventual good purpose.
Whether it is to teach you a lesson about pride, or hope, or trust, or perseverance, there will be a reason everything in your life occurs.
Be open to what lies ahead. Don't hide from what life will bring to your doorstep. Trust me, the journey will change you for the better.

#4) Don't be afraid of risk-taking.
Up until this point, you have led a rather conventional life. Yes, you experienced the loss of your job 10 years ago, with two young children and a wife depending on you, but you took a big chance on yourself and it has worked out so far. Generally speaking, though you have played it safe.
I don't mean just in your career, but in how you live. You hate being a beginner so you are loath to try new things. On vacations, you pick safe places and "normal" activities. You rarely push the envelope in much of anything.  
From where I sit now, I wish you (I) had been more willing to stretch myself. I wish I had tried different lifestyles, hobbies, creative outlets, and physical expressions. Over the last few years I have come to appreciate what pushing back a bit can mean to the fullness of life. Get a jump start. Take more risks now, when you are still healthy and young enough to do so.

         Love you,
Your older self

November 28, 2016

Top 7 Retirement FAQs

On Web sites FAQs are Frequently Asked Questions. They are the inquires that occur often enough to be predictable. The questions are followed by short, to-the-point answers that sometimes actually answers the questions. Here are my responses to the most common satisfying retirement FAQ over the past 6+ years. Each also has a link to a post that deals with that subject in more detail:

1) How much money do I need to retire? Enough to live comfortably and handle most emergencies. You will probably end up needing more than you think. If you live in Scottsdale, La Jolla, or West Palm Beach, a lot more. Don't believe all the "rules" about how much you have to save or how little you can withdraw each year and not risk running out of money. Life is a constant adjustment to situations. No one can predict what the future will be like or how you will want to live. Stay flexible. But, I will say that the oft-used $1 million figure isn't necessary. 
 Link:  How Much Money Do I need To Retire?

2) Won't I become bored? Maybe. But, don't you become bored now? Boredom is easily solved. Find something interesting to occupy your mind and time. Retirement is all about trying on a new you. If you become bored it is because you aren't looking hard enough for alternatives. Besides, there are worse fates in life than being bored for awhile. 
Link:  Do You Ever Get Bored?

 3) H
ow do I fill all that time? You will be amazed at how quickly all that time fills up. Your real problem will be finding enough time to do all you want to do. Learning to manage the only resource you have that can never be replaced is a skill that will, in large part, determine how satisfying your retirement becomes. What to do after retirement? Your choices are limited only by you. 
Link: My First Few years of Retirement: Time Management

4) My spouse doesn't want me around the house all day..what do I do? Go somewhere else for a while. Take long walks, go to the library, volunteer a few times a week. Do things around the house that make him or her want you around. Part of the time do what your spouse wants to do. Part of the time do what you want to do. The rest of the time do things together.
Link:  Adjusting To Time Together

5) Can I spend all day in sweats? Sure. But, a word of advice...don't. There is no need to dress up as if you are still going to work. However, lounging around all day in a bathrobe or an old sweatshirt will affect your energy and desire to make something of the day. Develop a morning routine that includes dressing well enough to leave the house, even if you don't plan to. It really does make a difference.
Link:  My Time, Your Time, Our Time

6) Can I unretire? Absolutely. That is one of the best parts of retirement, there are no firm rules. In fact you can retire, unretire, and retire again as many times as you want. Maybe you'll find that financially you could use the extra income. Maybe you like interacting with different people each day and miss the stimulation of an office or factory floor. A part time job may be perfect for you. What if you've always wanted to have your own business or turn a hobby into income? No problem. Retirement is as much about attitude and freedom as it is about your state of employment.
Link: Going Back To Work After Retirement

7) What will happen to my health and health insurance? If I had the answer to that after the recent election results I wouldn't be writing FAQs.

Did I miss an FAQ you want answered?  Comment away!

November 25, 2016

Online Thieves Are Looking For You

The holiday shopping season has begun in earnest. Projections are a 10% increase in online sales over last year, which already set records. Unfortunately, that means a growing opportunity for those who want to separate you from your money, your online identity, or plant an infected piece of software on your computer.

I received information from Enigma Software Group, a company that markets anti-malware software. There were sobering statistics on the spike in growth of this dangerous phenomenon.  The company also gave me some tips to pass along to help keep you safe. Be on high alert for:

1) Spam emails and links promising great deals. Malware makers know that people will be on the lookout for great prices on everything from Xboxes to phones. They'll send bogus emails promising super low prices.

And those emails will contain links that can install malware if they are clicked. The bad guys will also post bad links in Facebook and Twitter accounts that they hijack.

2) Fake emails that look like they are from real online retailers. Bad guys know it's likely you've bought something online from Amazon or Toys R Us. So they send fake emails that tell you there was a problem with your recent order, hoping you'll click on a link that will install malware.

3) Poisoned search results. Sophisticated cyber crooks can create fake web pages promising to sell hot holiday items at very low prices. 
They can even work to make those pages show up in Google searches for particular products. If someone clicks over to the bogus page, an infection is just a few seconds away. 

Some of the more common infections today can steal personal information, access your contacts and important files, and in some cases literally hold your computer hostage until you pay a ransom to unlock it. In fact, the percentage of overall infections made up of “ransomware” has doubled from 2015 to today. 

To protect yourself, the company suggests:

Never click on links in social media messages. This includes Twitter direct messages and messages sent to you via Facebook. They may look like they are coming from your friends, but there's a good chance their account has been compromised and cybercrooks are trying to trick you.

Be wary of unfamiliar web sites that ask you to install software before continuing with your shopping. Most of the time that software has malware embedded in it.

Always have reliable anti-spyware and anti-malware software installed  and make sure to run frequent scans and updates.

If you are trying to check on the status of an online order, type the web site of the retailer into your address bar manually to log in and check. Don't trust a link sent in an email.

Other important reminders include:

A) Be careful with unsecured WiFi connections, like those found at coffee shops, shopping malls, maybe even your own home. Cyber-thieves have become quite adept at stealing information from an open WiFi link.

B) Become sensitive to phishing (fishing) scams. Emails designed to look like a legitimate business hope to entice you to click on a link or respond to an "urgent" request for more information. Do so, and you have been compromised.

C) Social media oversharing can be a problem. Too many details about yourself, like birth date, previous locations of where you lived, your mom's maiden name (as part of a family site), or too low a privacy setting can equal a golden opportunity for ID theft.

D) "12345" or "password" are open doors to thieves. Use strong passwords that combine symbols, upper and lower case letters, and numbers in a string that is meaningless. Hard to remember? Sure. Hard to steal? Absolutely.

E) If a store or business you do business with has a data breach where millions of customer records are stolen or accessed, become very vigilant in checking your bank, credit union, and credit card accounts for unexpected activity. Within a few months, take advance of the free credit check offered at Annual Credit Report to look for suspicious activity or charges. 

With the convenience of our online life comes the necessity to realize that bad people want to take advantage of that technology. Each of us is ultimately responsible for our cyber well-being. Sad, but true.

November 24, 2016

Happy Thanksgiving

Though the contentious election season is finally past us, there remain powerful feelings and a sense that we have a long season of healing.

Even more than most years, for this day I want to keep my focus on the good things in my life, and that starts with family. As we gather together, all the other problems will disappear and become unimportant, at least for a day.

I also must thank my faithful readers. For over six years you have made Satisfying Retirement a labor of love for me. You are part of my family, too.

God Bless you and yours on the day to remember the good things in our life. 

Happy Thanksgiving,

Bob, Betty, and Bailey 

November 21, 2016

The #1 Problem With Our Health Care Future

No, it is not the massive increase in ACA premiums for those who must buy on the individual market. Nor is it the similar increase in deductibles and copays for the health insurance that the 80% of us who get coverage through our jobs must face. 

No, it is not the consolidation of the industry, where a handful of companies control our options. Nor, is it the immoral increases in life-saving drug costs.

No, it is not the inability of our political "leaders" to arrive at a solution that works for those in need. Heavens, they refuse to even talk with each other, preferring threats and slurs instead. Nor is it the slow acceptance by most of us that our health is primarily dependent on choices we make in diet, exercise, and lifestyle. 

The Number One problem with our health care future is.....uncertainty.

Retirement is a period in our lives when we welcome many changes, new opportunities, new directions, a new sense of the possible. We take back control of the clock, our schedule. But, what we don't want is uncertainty. And, there is a big difference between change and being unsure.

The difference is the source. Change is usually initiated by us. Except for obvious things like a health problem or financial reversal, most of what we do during our retirement is to choose...choose what to do with our time, our talents, our resources. We choose to live closer to family, or farther away! We choose when and where to go on vacation. We choose what makes it on our calendar.

Uncertainty is change without choice. We can't plan very well when we don't know what is around the corner. Obamacare will be repealed. It will be replaced by something that has yet to be defined as workable for those most in need. 

So, will my wife start with her new insurance company in January, only to find the system that supports it taken away shortly thereafter? Do we budget for thousands of dollars a month in coverage? Or do we decide to roll the dice and self insure until 65 (assuming Medicare isn't next on the chopping block)?

Will health insurance companies continue to group together, leaving virtually no real choice for customers? Even now Betty cannot get a referral to a specialist in network that isn't more than 50 miles away, has English listed as a third language, and is booked up for 4 months.

With the stunning election results still reverberating around the world, any hope we had for less uncertainty in our health care situation has been shattered. The only certainty we can count on is things are going to get a whole lot more unsure for as far as we care to gaze into the future. 

November 18, 2016

Caregiving: A Burden or Gift?

I received the following press release about caregivers and those who are cared for. I found the results both encouraging and distressing. I' welcome your reaction.

SAN FRANCISCO – October 31, 2016 – As part of November’s National Family Caregivers Month, Honor™ (, the fast-growing tech-powered home care company, surveyed ove3r 1,000 men and women ages 18 and older across the U.S. and found a surprising discrepancy in opinions and perspectives related to caring for aging loved ones.

The 2016 Honor Family Caregiving Survey revealed that age and experience have a strong impact on attitudes. In particular, a larger number of Americans within the consumer sampling who hadn’t yet been exposed to the caregiving process or personally tasked with the related responsibilities viewed caring for an older loved one as a “burden.” 

This same group also expressed far greater concern over the financial impact of providing care. Ironically, those who were already deep in the trenches of a caregiving role viewed the experience as a “gift,” and were less concerned about cost implications, despite the potential toll on their career, financial security and other life responsibilities.

Family caregiver perspective:

● 21% believe caring for an aging loved one is a “gift”
● 6% believe it’s a “burden”

Non-caregiver perspective:

● 8% believe caring for an aging loved one is a “gift”
● 14% believe it’s a “burden”

Those who didn’t see caregiving as a gift or burden accepted the role as merely “a part of life.”

“Regardless of our current life stage and attitudes toward assuming a caregiver role, when that moment comes for us to provide long-term support to an aging parent or grandparent - many of us are simply unprepared,” said Phaedra Ellis-Lamkins, Honor’s Head of Care.

“We asked men and women from all age groups and walks of life if they would be able to provide appropriate care if a loved one suddenly needed it, and nearly 57% said they could not. And, nearly 88% surveyed said it would be up to them -- alone or with a sibling -- to shoulder the responsibility. Collectively, these are sobering statistics given that our senior population will nearly double by the year 2030."

Who Is Providing the Care?

40% of survey respondents serve, or have served, as a caregiver for a parent, grandparent or aging loved one. Among these caregivers:

● 10% are 18-29 years
● 25% are 30-44 years
● 31% are 45-59 years
● 34% are 60+ years
● 59% of family caregivers are women
● 41% of family caregivers are men
● 26% believe their career or professional life has suffered as a result of caring for a loved one
● 58% of these caregivers believe their loved one requires more care than they alone can provide

*Click here for survey graphics.

Among respondents who are not currently family caregivers, six out of 10 believe it’s likely they will play this important role in the future. But only 43% of non-caregivers believe they would be prepared to provide the appropriate care if a loved one suddenly needed assistance. Seventy-five percent would not be able to provide more than 20 hours of care per week.

Added Ellis-Lamkins: “We learned a lot from this consumer study about attitudes toward paid and unpaid care. When asked what the biggest consideration was when choosing care for a loved one, concern for a loved one’s happiness ranked the highest at 57% among experienced caregivers -- well over concerns about the expense of care, which ranked at 7.9%. Also, ensuring trust and safety with the caregiver ranked as the single biggest source of worry, among all concerned, when it comes to bringing a new caregiver into the home.”

To help Americans become more informed about the caregiving process, here are  three essential tips for family caregivers:

1) Create a caregiving plan that involves the recipient and other family members. Ninety-one percent surveyed indicated that their loved one would prefer to stay in their own home, if possible. Volunteers and paid professionals alike should always be appropriately vetted with a background check and provided with feedback after each visit to ensure that their care style and protocols are in sync with family member expectations.

2) Establish and maintain a relationship with your loved one’s medical team and share regular notes and communication to help keep them informed about care and wellness routines that take place in the home.

3) Remember that it is important to care for yourself too - prioritizing your own health will help you manage stress and, ultimately, be a more effective care provider.

To me, the most important finding was the shift in attitude after caregiving of a loved one began. The shift from "burden" to "gift" was encouraging. 

Also quite obvious is the importance of preparing fully before that role becomes reality. I would expect that preparation and getting things in order would help lessen the feeling of care being a negative in one's life.

If you have been, or are a caregiver for another, I would love your feedback. How do the results of the survey match your feelings and experiences? What can you share that would help the rest of us get ready for this situation?

Satisfying Retirement was provided with this information by the company involved. The blog was not compensated for its use, nor can independently verify the results. The material is provided for informational purposes only.

November 15, 2016

Confessions Of a News Junkie

I blame it on the just-past election mayhem. I blame it on the ease of being constantly updated on a smartphone or tablet. I blame it on a personal weakness. Whatever the reason, I have spent way too much time looking at the news, opinion columns, and analysis of what is going on in the world.

With November 8th in the rear view mirror, I thought I'd be able to cut back. After all, the constant drumbeat of political news and non-news is over. But, no, that hasn't happened quite yet.

Obviously, the election of the President didn't bring a conclusion, a satisfactory ending to anything for a large part of the country. It only stoked the political fires that were already at a dangerously high level. After a few days of self-imposed exile, I was back obsessively grabbing for the phone much too often.

After a few years of receiving no morning newspaper I did break down. Waiting in my driveway six mornings a week is the Wall Street Journal. While I rarely agree with their editorial stance, they offer a good overview of economic news and lifestyle information. Whether I renew my subscription next spring is still an open question. Staff cutbacks and a shrinking paper indicate the WSJ may be fighting the losing battle of most print media.

Clicking on news updates and the latest from the stock market is too easy for someone who spends a few hours a day in front of his computer. I may be in the middle of typing a post or answering some log comments, when suddenly I have a strong urge to see what I have been missing. A click here, a click there, and I am gone from what I was doing for a chunk of time.

Interestingly, I don't watch news programs on television. Depending on the channel I pretty much know what they are going to report on or how information will be presented. Usually, they will 20 minutes or more on an individual topic, analyzing it to death. 

I receive no magazines that would be in the political, economic, or news categories. By the time the publication reaches my mailbox, whatever is on the front cover is likely old news. Magazines are fine for ideas for home projects, hobbies and the like. But, for current events, I don't find them timely enough.

But, the smartphone and computer! Instant input whenever my heart craves it. Google searches during slow plot points of a TV movie. Video updates from CNN. The latest breaking story on Huffpost or Politico. What the BBC says, from a British perspective, about something happening in America. The choices are apparently endless.

Even on the just-completed RV trip, one of my first chores was to check on the strength of the WiFi connection. Try as I might to stay away while I was away, it didn't work. A poor Internet feed could ruin my afternoon.

Betty has learned to warn me about excessive news input just before bedtime. She knows that last minute jolt leaves me agitated and keeps me awake. 

So, is there an answer to this compulsion, or is this a phase of my retirement that will eventually burn itself out? Will I accept that my checking news and informational feeds doesn't change what is going to happen anyway, it just tends to aggravate me? A line in an article in the Washington Post a awhile back seems to summarize my problem: "Through media in all its forms, we exhaust and are exhausted by the insignificant."

Wait,  I have been typing this post for 30 minutes...I wonder what I have missed? Probably not much.

November 12, 2016

Retire With Less Than One Million Dollars? Sure

From the archives. First published three years ago, these thoughts continue to be appropriate as 10,000 people a day retire.

According to many retirement advice experts, $1,000,000 is the minimum you need in your investments accounts to have a satisfying retirement. Others say you need something north of $2 million to rest easy.

As regular readers know, I tend to push back against such generalizations. How someone can draw a line in the sand and tell you what you must have or must do without knowing you and your situation is poppycock (I love that word!).  I offer suggestions and advice based on my experiences and feedback from readers, but I hope I am never guilty of telling you "my way or doom."

That being said let me offer some thoughts on how the non-millionaires among us can still retire and enjoy a fulfilling and stimulating life. Again, I will say these are thoughts from me. They may not work for you, or you may have even better ideas which I sincerely hope you will leave as comments below.

In the interest of full disclosure I will state that with all my assets, minus my almost non-existent debt, Betty and I are technically millionaires. But, I have never thought of myself that way, and honestly, I live my life denying that fact. I live my retirement years on a nest egg that I see as several hundred thousand dollars below that figure. Why? To give me a safety net if everything starts to fall apart and to keep me from making the mistakes that I see too many others making: living for wants and instead of a balance of needs and wants.

How to retire without a million dollars is really quite simple: adjust your lifestyle to what you have to work with. That includes any 401(k) or IRA accounts, any other investment accounts, Social Security, the value of your home or other real estate, projected inheritance (if any), and part time or full time income.


1) The vast majority of us can substantially lower our everyday expenses after retirement. My book, Living a Satisfying Retirement, includes a section on this very topic. The average of those surveyed  is much closer to folks living on 50% of their pre-retirement income. Betty and I are closer to 40%, even though we live well and are much happier than when my salary was into six figures. Possessions and things don't motivate us nearly as much.

2) For unexpected emergencies and expenses set aside enough to live for 6 months, or pay for a large emergency. Remember, even if you have insurance for whatever the problem, you will probably have to fight for that money and/or wait months or years to be reimbursed. The worst scenario is to max out credit cards or a home equity loan.

3) Simplicity and retirement can often go together. Most of the retirees I come into contact with, both in real life and through the blog, have downsized both possessions and desires. Less really is more: more time, freedom, and flexibility. Keeping up with the Joneses becomes very unimportant.

4) Adjust your expenses based on two things: changes in your investments and changes in your lifestyle. This is rather obvious. When my investments were earning 8-10% my income and spending options were different than they are with something closer to 3%. And, Betty and I are very happy with simple meals, simple pleasures, and simple living.

5) Accept that the condo on Maui and the world cruise are out. Rejoice in all you can do. With a nest egg of less than $1,000,000 and upwards of 30 years left to live, your ability to live the large life is not likely. So, rejoice with what you do have and what you can do. Even if you live almost solely on Social Security and must count every penny, remember you are still better off than at least 80% of the rest of the people on this planet. We have so many opportunities and blessings we can lose sight of how good we really do have it.

6) Aggressively protect your health. As I age I realize how incredibly crucial this is to the rest of my satisfying retirement. Taking shortcuts now in terms of foods I eat, exercising, and regular health checkups will cost me later, and I don't just mean monetarily. I mean in my mobility and freedom to do what pleases me. I mean in how much of a burden I place on loved ones.

It is hard for me to express, just in words, how much more fulfilling and satisfying my lifestyle is today on 60% less money than I once earned. As soon as I adjusted my mindset to living and not spending a load was lifted and my life took on a whole new depth and sweetness.

How much do you need to achieve this same state? I have no idea and I'm not going to give you a figure. That is for you to determine. But, I will tell you the experts are wrong: you can be happy and productive without achieving whatever is the latest magic number they are promoting.

November 9, 2016

Aging: The Top 9 To-Do List

I am a sucker for lists. To-do lists, productivity lists, how to be happy lists, the best movies in a foreign language list...doesn't matter. I like lists. 

A good friend sent me this list. A Google search identified the source as a banking relationship management company, based in Lebanon. The original list included 21 items. I have shortened it to nine. 

1. It’s time to use the money you saved up. Use and enjoy it. Don’t just keep it for those who may have no notion of the sacrifices you made to get it. Remember there is nothing more dangerous than a son or daughter-in-law with big ideas for your hard earned capital. Warning: This is also a bad time for a [major] investment, even if it seems wonderful or fool-proof. They only bring problems and worries. This is a time for you to enjoy some peace and quiet.

2. Keep a healthy life, without great physical effort. Do moderate exercise (like walking every day), eat well and get your sleep. It’s easy to become sick, and it gets harder to remain healthy. That is why you need to keep yourself in good shape and be aware of your medical and physical needs. Keep in touch with your doctor, do tests even when you’re feeling well. Stay informed.

3. Always buy the best, most beautiful items for your significant other. The key goal is to enjoy your money with your partner. One day one of you will miss the other, and the money will not provide any comfort then, enjoy it together.

4. Don’t stress over the little things. You’ve already overcome so much in your life. You have good memories and bad ones, but the important thing is the present. Don’t let the past drag you down and don’t let the future frighten you. Feel good in the now. Small issues will soon be forgotten.

5. ALWAYS stay up-to-date. Read newspapers, watch the news. Go online and read what people are saying. Make sure you have an active email account and try to use some of those social networks. You’ll be surprised what old friends you’ll meet. Keeping in touch with what is going on and with the people you know is important at any age.

6. Respect the younger generation and their opinions. They may not have the same ideals as you, but they are the future, and will take the world in their direction. Give advice, not criticism, and try to remind them that yesterday’s wisdom still applies today.

7. Even if you don’t feel like it, try to accept invitations. Baptisms, graduations, birthdays, weddings, conferences. Try to go. Get out of the house, meet people you haven’t seen in a while, experience something new (or something old). But don’t get upset when you’re not invited. Some events are limited by resources, and not everyone can be hosted. The important thing is to leave the house from time to time. Go to museums, go walk through a field. Get out there.

8. Be a conversationalist. Talk less and listen more. Some people go on and on about the past, not caring if their listeners are really interested. That’s a great way of reducing their desire to speak with you. Listen first and answer questions, but don’t go off into long stories unless asked to. Speak in courteous tones and try not to complain or criticize too much unless you really need to. Try to accept situations as they are. Everyone is going through the same things, and people have a low tolerance for hearing complaints. Always find some good things to say as well.

9. Take no notice of what others say about you and even less notice of what they might be thinking. They’ll do it anyway, and you should have pride in yourself and what you’ve achieved. Let them talk and don’t worry. They have no idea about your history, your memories and the life you’ve lived so far. There’s still much to be written, so get busy writing and don’t waste time thinking about what others might think. Now is the time to be at rest, at peace and as happy as you can be!

Solid advice.

November 8, 2016

Today's The Day

To my American readers:

If you haven't already voted, then vote. Whatever you do, vote today. 

If you voted early, congratulations. You don't have to worry about long lines and unhappy people.

Watch, or don't watch the results tonight - they will be the same.

Wake up tomorrow with four thoughts:

1. It is over ( we hope!).

2. Tens of millions of your fellow countrymen will be very happy.

3. Tens of millions of your fellow countrymen will be very unhappy.

4. The sun will rise.

See you with a fresh post tomorrow. I have every confidence our world will still be here.

November 5, 2016

If Only I Knew This When I Retired

I  have been retired for 15 years. When I stopped working the world was a different place than it is today. 9/11 was still 3 months in the future. That event would shake up just about everything, including retirement. Financial planning and a certain predictability of how things worked would change almost overnight. Well laid plans would be shaken to the core.  

While still adjusting to a new world, our system suffered yet another huge shock just seven years later, with a recession that came close to an economic meltdown. It's ripples are still being felt today. I could argue that the contentious election cycle we are enduring is part of that ripple. 

Just because I had retired didn't mean I was isolated from the twin shocks of the terrorist attacks and the financial mess we found ourselves. In fact, in looking back I think those events may have had a greater effect on me mentally than if I were still getting a paycheck. I felt I had little control over my investments or economic well being. I didn't have an obvious path back to generating more income. 

If the stock market or banking institutions started to fail I was dependent on the government to make me (partially) whole at some undefined time in the future. My house seemingly lost value with every passing week. I could see years of planning start to slip away. 

Luckily for me, that didn't happen. I lost a bunch, on paper, and then rebounded within 4 years. The stress, worry, and time lost wondering what would happen was very real, but not permanent. I know I was lucky. I learned a very valuable lesson that continues to pay dividends today: There is always a path forward. Even when events conspire against us, there is positive movement possible. The surroundings, the trappings of one's life, the place and type of life one lives may all change, and not necessarily for the better. 

But, the freedom that comes with retirement, the ability to shape a life that is satisfying, regardless of the external circumstances, is a never-ending gift. The ability to not only survive, but thrive on a different path than the one planned for, is something I wish I knew when I first retired. 

My life in 2016 is not the one I envisioned in June of 2001. In fact, what turns me on today and keeps me motivated wasn't even on my radar back then. I could not have predicted how things are evolving. Now I understand what truly is important and makes me happy. If I had only known!

I must add that millions of my fellow retirees weren't as fortunate. Their future was forever altered by the events of the last 16 years. Retirement became a dream for many that was delayed, or unattainable. For them, much of what I write about a satisfying retirement probably rings hollow. And, for that I am truly sorry. The best I  can do is offer encouragement, maybe help you find a different path forward with what I write here, and be a sounding board for your frustration.